Phrasing the ideas

There are many components to a sentence which will create a theme, or engage an audience. As part of a mock examination, a student in year 6 was asked to produce a piece of work ‘off the top of his head’, which is what is expected of them when they reach that examination hall.

He was given the title, ‘A Busy Place’, and a few pointers;

®     People rushing around

®     It was crowded

®     Everyone hurrying

®     Activity and movement everywhere

®     Lots of noise

The idea of the pointers was to ‘push’ the students in one direction and concentrate their ideas into a 20 minute piece.

I have included a copy of it here, and I am certain you will agree, this shows great developing skill in producing very good quality short stories.

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The street was filled with people babbling with excitement. The deafening noise of the horns and hooters enveloped the mind isolating it from other sounds. People crowded the once silent street, coming from every direction. Adults and children jostled in front of the glass window, peering in.

People leapt up and down, trying to get a glimpse in the store; children crowding under adults, trying to get a sneaky peak. Cars honked their horns trying to move through the bustling crowd.

Every once in a while, the crowd would become rowdy and raucous as someone would strut out of the shop holding their treasure, wrapped in a massive cardboard box; the new Grand Theft Auto.

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The trick here was to take an event he had some recollection about and develop his recall of that time. 

A game parents can play is to think of a time and describe it without giving away when it was and what it was you were all doing and the other person has to guess when and what it was. Once they have guessed your one then it’s their turn to describe without explaining. At first they will find it hard, so you must start with a simple example; maybe brushing your teeth or washing up.

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What we are aiming for is a child who can recall things they have done or have witnessed first hand which they can draw upon and re-live. This is where the internet and the television fall down because they do not involve the person in the experience and therefore it does not get stored in the brain in the same way. For them to be able to use it in their literacy they have to have experienced it, for it to be a memory not a piece of information. 

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So , as parents, we can help them here too, by going out and experiencing different things, taking them out of their comfort zone and getting them to; have a picnic in the park if its something you don’t usually do, or going for a walk in the woods, or kicking leaves through the park, or walking along the sea front when its windy (not gales obviously), but get them out and experience the natural world without spending oodles of money. 

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These memories will go into their storehouse ready to pop out in their stories, as it did with Ollie, when he wrote his 20 minute piece.